Sexual bullying


Sexual Bullying Disrupts Childhood

Sexual bullying can put a child’s life at risk – forcing them to behave in a promiscuous manner and robbing them of their innocence. Together, we can change that.

Sexual bullying is a type of harassment that occurs in connection with a child’s sex,  body, sexual orientation or with sexual activity itself. Today this is a serious problem due to the varying models of cultural acceptability. Sexual bullying is occurring over the internet as children are encouraged to act in an immodest way by taking naked selfies. There are also increased use of sexual language in younger children, and unwarranted touching and physical advances.

Sexual language and vulgar comments which are more than childish fun can destroy the dreams of childhood. If they leave the target upset, embarrassed or afraid, then it is considered harassment. Certain images and inappropriate jokes can constitute sexual bullying.

A teenager or even younger on the receiving end of sexual bullying is likely to be insulted, cyberbullied, ostracized, shamed and gossiped about.  It can cause untold distress and can lead to serious repercussions on the person who is targeted in this way.

While early gay and lesbian orientation is now an accepted and even promoted part of school life in the UK, not everyone is happy about this. Children at school are having to cope with the fall-outs and prejudices of this new change. Homophobic bullying  can lead to severe psychological breakdown.


Child sexual abuse online

When sexual exploitation happens online, young people may be persuaded or bullied to:

  • Send or post sexually explicit images of themselves
  • Take part in sexual activities via a webcam or smartphone
  • Have sexual conversations by text or online.

Once this happens the perpetrators may threaten to send images, video or copies of indecent conversations to the child or teenager’s friends and family. That way they get them to take part in other sexual activity.

Images or videos may continue to be shared long after the initial sexual abuse has stopped.




How to talk to children about the risks of sexting – and what you can do to protect them

It may feel awkward, but it’s important to explain to children the risks of sexting, how to stay safe and remind them that they can talk to you if something ever makes them feel scared or uncomfortable.


What is sexting?

Sexting is when someone shares sexual, naked or semi-naked images or videos of themselves or others, or sends sexually explicit messages.

It can also be called “dirties” “pic for pic” “trading nudes” .

These can be sent using any device that allows you to share media or message. Sexting happens over the internet via laptops and PCs. They are also sent via mobiles and smartphones.



What the law says

Sexting can be breaking the law.  Creating or sharing explicit images of a child is illegal, even if the person doing it is a child. However, if it is done by a child or young person, the police can choose to record that a crime has been committed but that taking formal action isn’t in the public interest.

It is a crime for a child to:

  • Take an explicit photo or video of themselves or a friend
  • Share an explicit image or video of a child, even if it’s shared between children of the same age
  • Possess, download or store an explicit image or video of a child, even if the child gave their permission for it to be created.

If a matter is recorded as a crime it will only appear if the young person involved reoffends or shows that they are a risk to the public


Why do young people sext?

The following reasons are listed as why young people get involve in sexting:

  • To get attention and connect with new people on social media
  • Joining in because they think that ‘everyone is doing it’
  • Boosting their self-esteem
  • Flirting with others and testing their sexual identity
  • Exploring their sexual feelings
  • They may find it difficult to say no if somebody asks them for an explicit image, especially if the person asking is persistent.

However, AAB believes that the reasons they do this is to win a boyfriend or girlfriend and as a result of peer pressure to be cool.


Sexually Exploitative Bullying

Grooming children destroys their childlife – forcing them to alienate from their peers and families. Together, we can fight that.

Child sexual exploitation has become linked with bullying in recent years because of widespread use of the internet.  This type of sexual abuse involves someone who is abusing their power to place children in a compromising situation.  This often begins with children receiving some form of gift, money or affection in return for performing sexual activities or allowing others to do the same.

These are distinct from the normal boy meets girl type of situation in that the behaviour is targeted and deliberate.  Vulnerable young people may be tricked into believing they’re in a proper relationship. Often drugs and alcohol are involved.

This type of conduct was flagged up after the highly publicised case of organised sexual abuse in Rotherham, South Yorkshire, England, between 1997 and 2013 when five men of Pakistani heritage were found guilty of a series of sexual offences against girls as young as twelve. Other high profile cases include the abuse carried out by Jimmy Saville which lifted the lid off the widespread nature of cases where children as young as five have been abused and their situation ignored.  Reasons for the cover up have included the unwillingness to report members of covered ethnic minority communities for fear of being seen as racist, and the celebrity factor.

Because sexual exploitation of children by adults using grooming methods (i.e. relationship building for criminal reason) is often carried out over the internet, the methods used are similar to those employed in bullying. Serious crime offences are investigated by the police but lesser breaches of trust rely on the targets coping techniques similar to those employed in cyberbullying cases.


Sexual Grooming Online

Grooming, like bullying is an abuse of power. It is when someone in a superior role builds a relationship with a child explicitly to gain their trust in order to take advantage of their innocence and abuse them sexually.

Groomers may be male or female. They could be any age.

Many children and young people don’t understand that they have been groomed, or in the process of being manipulated with the intention of sexual activity.


How grooming online happens

Groomers use deceptive methods and sometimes over a long time to conceal their criminal intentions.  They do this by:

  • Lying about their age online, for example pretending to be someone they are not
  • Giving the child attention and advice
  • Using their online relationship to learn private gossip to control children in the future

Once they have established trust, groomers will seek to isolate the child from friends or family. They will then try and make the child feel dependent on them. They will use any means of power or control to make a child believe they have no choice but to do what they want.  This can involve sexting, meeting up or passing private information. Groomers introduce the language of ‘secrets’ as a way of controlling and frightening the child.

Groomers can use social media sites, instant messaging apps including teen dating apps, or online gaming platforms to connect with a young person or child.

It is easy for them to learn about their target via online profiles where they can build a picture of the young person’s favourite films, bands and other interests.  They use this to build up a relationship.

Because of the nature of the internet, it is relatively simple for groomers to hide their identity when they are on the internet.  They will usually pretend to be a child themselves and then chat and become ‘friends’ with children they are targeting.

This form of abuse is on the rise. Very often groomers will send messages to hundreds of young people and wait for a response.  Otherwise they try to connect with children who have publicly declared they are vulnerable in some way.  They are instantly attracted to children who have “sexy” usernames or use modern sexual banter. Their aim is to get that child to take part in some form of sexual activity. If this is on film it can be circulated or used as blackmail.

Sexual grooming is increasing because children are often too ashamed of themselves to report it. They may feel guilty that they have let themselves and their parents down. Or they may still trust the groomer and believe they are in a real life relationship with either a boyfriend or a girlfriend.

What is Cyber stalking?

“Stalking someone on the net” is almost a figure of speech amongst people today because we spend so much time researching online.   However, actually stalking is a terrifying and dangerous behaviour which is on the increase. Anyone can become a target and children are no exception.

Stalking has become a direct progression from cyberbullying encouraging some people to become obsessed with tracking the movements of others.  While mostly this is innocent and a normal part of modern life, stalking is also a tool of online sexual groomers and abusers.

The plight of children or teens who are being stalked or carrying out stalking is often ignored because parents, schools and police think that they are too young to be victims. Also very little research has been carried out on this age group, even though stalking activities in general are up by a third because of the internet.

Stalking is defined as repeated harassment over weeks or months.


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